There’s no denying that trauma scatters our minds. The mind tries to protect itself and starts shutting down. The issue is that late capitalist society expects us all to be our best selves, all the time, but provides very little to support this pursuit.
In school, hours were dedicated to learning quotes by heart, but no one took a moment to teach us how to function as adults. This used to perplex me until I fully realised how wildly disregarded mental health is, particularly in Malta.
“Moħħ ir-Riħ” is a Maltese expression for an absent mind, typically uttered dismissively. However, what might be misconstrued as inattentive could simply be preoccupied. I like the expression because it literally means “winds’ mind”, which conjures an image of holding desperately to a tether – not in control, but not defeated. This self-portrait reminds me to embrace my new challenges and approach them with more self-love and let go a little.
The subject is displaced to the left, followed by a fracturing halo and emptiness. There is also an absence of the subject’s crown, extenuated by the introduction of horns. The horns reflect my rejection of oppressive catholic norms, the layers of stigma the church perpetuates against anyone like me [queer, pro-choice, atheist, neuro-divergent and polyamorous], and make reference to the centuries of subjugation faced by Jewish communities [another traditionally ostracised group] at the hand of Christian rulers stemming from supposed poor medieval translation.